
Can you opt
out of Christmas? Not all of it, but the parts you don’t like and enjoy. I think, yes. Of course, if you actually enjoy the season and the traditions and
the increased emphasis on certain values, then why would you want to?
The sad thing is, so many people seem to hate, or at least feel indifferent
towards, Christmas, and yet they still grudgingly participate.
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Advice articles on how to deal with Christmas: Why is this a thing? |
And from the
outset of this blog, let it be known that I love shopping. I love clothes and
accessories and knickknacks and buying things. I’ve even gone through periods of
what can only be described as shopaholicism, in which I’ve recorded all my
purchases in an effort to curb the habit.
I’ve also always enjoyed, really
enjoyed, shopping for Christmas presents and I’ve always loved - and savoured - a lot of aspects of the Christmas season. This isn’t about disliking Christmas. I’m also an atheist, so the
secularization of religious holidays doesn’t bother me. This has nothing to do
with the absence of Christ in Christmas.
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Merry Christmas. |
Christmas is
discussed, especially in polite small talk, as a communally experienced doom,
something that becomes increasingly stressful as we get older, and we succumb
to the pressure of entertaining and facilitating the charade of Santa Claus.
The shopping for many people isn’t fun and enjoyable – it’s a burden. They
spend more than they can afford and go into debt to give gifts they feel
pressured to give. They worry about getting “enough” and getting “the right
things.” And this isn’t just some toys for some Santa-fearing children, but for
everyone.
I understand
that I’m not a parent, and so there are aspects of the “pressures” of this
custom that I have not yet confronted. I have thought for years now that, when
I become a parent (and I intend to), I will not reinforce the idea of Santa
Claus. I should mention, I told this to my class in high school and it was,
especially at that age, a controversial idea for which I took a lot of
criticism. It’s not that I dislike the core idea of Santa, or want to “kill the
magic” for kids – not at all. I just want to raise my kid(s) from the outset to
see Christmas as more than a chance to write a huge list and demand things from
an imaginary man, or to behave so Santa doesn’t put them on the naughty list.
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Christmas is a time for watching A Muppet Family Christmas. |
People need to
remember that at the root of all this shopping and decorating and stress is an
optional social custom.
(My devil’s
advocating, sociologically inclined boyfriend would here say something about
how such deeply entrenched and reinforced – and socially policed – customs and
traditions become non-optional, or at least they come to feel that way. OK,
point taken.)
If the build-up
to Christmas, and the holiday itself, is a pleasurable, fun, meaningful
experience, that’s great. I’ve personally always enjoyed and embraced the
Christmas season and really enjoyed gift exchange and celebrations, however
arbitrary they have become in terms of the secularized Christmas I “observe.”
But the stress, the debt, the complaining of having to clean your house for
company – it’s not worth it. If the cleaning and cooking is so frustrating and
annoying, don’t entertain! Let someone else host the family gathering.
At the end of
the day (and for the next 22 days and beyond) we should all remember that,
regardless of how you were raised and how you were cultured to experience
Christmas, your psychological relationship to this holiday is malleable. You can
change what it means to you and how you experience Christmas, the good and the
bad. Don’t blindly and unquestioningly follow the socially reinforced pressures
if, at the core, you don’t enjoy the rituals.
The “true” meaning of Christmas is a lot of different things to different people, but I don't think anyone would insist the true meaning is forced consumerism, ensuring non-needy children get more toys, and being stressed.
The “true” meaning of Christmas is a lot of different things to different people, but I don't think anyone would insist the true meaning is forced consumerism, ensuring non-needy children get more toys, and being stressed.
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